crushin'

Everybody has a crush on a city.

This is my hypothesis. Well, I suppose it's more of an observation because I don't intend to prove this . . . only discuss it.

I have a friend here, Heidi, who's city is London. Liz's is Washington . . . or maybe London (if she ever gets the chance to go there). I think Jessi's is London and I'm not sure about britt's. John's is definitely Paris. Karl's is Tokyo. Seems like everyone has one.

I was talking with Heidi the other day about these favorite cities. She absolutely loves London, so I accused her of having a crush on it. We laughed, I voiced my observation to her, and she asked which city I crushed on. She guessed New York before I could say it, and I smiled just thinking about it. I would say Seattle runs a close second and Portland is at least in the top five. Copenhagen is pretty rad too.

I have loved New York for a long, long time. I remember writing some goals down when I was like, twelve, and one of them was to live in New York City some time in my life. I honestly think my love developed so young partly as a result of the film Breakfast at Tiffany's. Is that ridiculous? I don't know if I'd still like to actually live in the city, but I love, LOVE visiting. I can't tell you exactly why I love it so much . . . there are many reasons. NYC has so much . . . culture, theatre, art and world-renown museums, a larger-than-life downtown, the subway, rain, beauty, cafes, off-beat stores, shops, and restaurants, water, beautiful buildings, old buildings, tall buildings, nightlife, history, Central Park, small businesses, brownstones, thunderstorms, music . . . I could go on and on. Anything you could possibly want, you can find there.

You may ask why I don't think I would be able to live there . . . well, NYC and I have a love-hate relationship. I am wild for it, but there are things I want in my life that NYC does not support very well. Have you tried to live and work in NY and have a family? Well, I know people who have, and it doesn't work too terribly well. In order to be successfull in New York, one must put his career first in his life.

Maybe I'll end up in upstate New York and visit. All the time.

What's your city crush?

" . . . and close our minds and hope that we'll be fine . . . "

Sorry I have been so terrible about posting lately. You see, I've been working a consistent 16-18 hours every day. I work from 7am (sometimes earlier) to 5:30pm (usually later) at the LDS Motion Picture Studio and then spend from 6pm or so until 11pm-ish painting at either BYU or PTC. It's pretty killer. I've worked as late as 2 or 3am, but that's really pushing it as I have to be up by 6:30 every morning and I'm doing physically taxing work all day long.

So, on top of this COMPLETELY insane schedule, I have a delusional boss at MoPic. This Wayne character I mentioned a couple posts back seriously has problems---the largest of which is his lack of leadership capabilities. He's the head scenic and can't run the crew or get along with his superiors. I don't really want to go into everything, but I'll just say it's very stressful and we can only do things his way (even if it's slower or not what the designers want). He makes me feel like a terrible painter, and I'm beginning to hate painting. He is punishes me because we don't get along with each other. Does this sound familiar, Jess?

I am intelligent/perceptive enough to realize the situation---I'm not going to stop painting. Despite my current altered mental state, I know that I will always love painting. It's just hard right now. I'm stretched too thin . . . which, would be completely manageable if I could get along with everyone.

So, here's to playing the game. I'm going to change my attitude, become someone else, and hope for the situation to improve. I'm at the end of my rope and out of options.

Kiefer vs. The Christmas Tree

I would just like to say, I love Kiefer Sutherland. I am becoming so much of a fan (which, admittedly at this point is not all that much of one), that I'm thinking about jumping on the 24 bandwagon, starting from season one, and working my way through. Perhaps this summer? Anyone own or know someone who owns the previous seasons of 24?

The following video clip is what inspired this post. I was unaware of this incident when it happened, but stumbled across the clip while poking around on Eric Snider's website (sidenote: very funny man and good film reviews). Here is Eric's blog post about it. You may find it (the clip and the blog post) entertaining --- especially britta. I only mention britta because I specifically remember she and I both being particularly intrigued by the idea of 24 when it came out. Have you watched it much in the past few years, britt?

Anyway, enjoy:

“Hey Kiefer, you’re a pirate, man.”
“That would explain everything.”

Memoirs of a Scenic Artist

My job is amazing. Actually, all of them are amazing.

Today, I was elbow-deep in a vat of paint, dipping chunks of styrofoam into it. They would've taken too long to paint with a brush, so this was the method Wayne (my boss) opted to use. You may think me strange, but it was awesome. They're going to be the pieces of debris on the set of the Temple of Solomon when it is destroyed. Also today, I painted some trim. You know you were born to be a scenic artist when you look forward to painting trim for two days. True story. For two days I've been looking forward to painting the trim on this shay's lounge we made. It had black and gold decorative painting, and I definitely wanted to do it. And I did.


And, let it be known that I too, am amazing.

Tonight, I sprayed the backdrop for my show, Sarah, Plain and Tall, all by myself. This may not seem like much of a feat to you, but it was definitely a momentous occasion. Not only did I get the sprayer to work on my own (it has taken Doug and I three hours in the past to get that thing started--it is an old, beastly, cranky machine), but I sprayed with two-parts paint, one-part water. That, is impressive. And, I moved the scaffolding on my own. AND, I was out of there by 10:20pm. Wham bam.

Freaking awesome.

"Dressed up like a car crash . . .. . . wheels are turning but you're upside down."

It is nearly 10:30pm and to my surprise, I am tired.  Not just worn-out-had-a-long-day tired, I'm ready-to-sleep-for-twenty-hours-and-maybe-cry-a-little tired.  This is a new feeling for me, especially so early in the evening.

I'm going to blame it on the fact that I worked from 7am to 11pm yesterday and ended up only getting about four hours' sleep last night.  I'm going to blame it on the fact that I have three jobs right now and am in the thick of designing two shows.  I'm going to blame it on the fact that I'm behind in everything I'm doing because my job at the LDS Motion Picture Studio is dominating my life.  I'm going to blame it on the fact that I'm supposed to have a sketch to the lighting designer and elevations for Mike, but I'm stressed out about being way behind.  I'm going to blame it on the fact that my tech weeks for these two shows are going to overlap . . . yeah, hear that?  TECH WEEKS OVERLAPPING.  Yes, blame sounds like a good idea.  The disturbing part still is, however, that it is before 2am and I am TIRED.  Seriously worn out, defeated, too-tired-to-just-suck-it-up-and-do-my-sketch tired.  This is the sort of feeling I have only experienced after being up for 48+ hours or only sleeping one to two hours per night for several days in a row.  THAT's when I'm allowed to feel this, and even then, only temporarily.  I'm not allowed to feel this way for so long.  Not now.

I suppose I had to grow up some day.  Needing sleep and having a regular sleeping schedule seem like such a non-college, mature, grown-up qualities.  I'm not so sure I'm ready for that.

Maybe just for this month (the month that I am working for the LDS Motion Picture Studio and getting up at an insanely early hour and doing hard physical labor all day long), I'll give myself a bedtime and see how it goes.  If I feel better by getting a regular amount of sleep at regular times, maybe it won't be so bad.  Since I get up between 6:00 and 6:15am, I'm thinking midnight is reasonable.  In order for this to work, though, I have to be consistent.  It means I'll have to schedule things in the future and procrastinate less.

I hate the feeling of not being in control of my consciousness.  I do not like my body telling me when I should stop nor do I like the idea of succumbing to physical weakness.  I hate not being able to control when I do and do not sleep.  I hate falling asleep when I didn't mean to and I hate it when my productivity goes down because of exhaustion.  These things haven't been a problem for me until recently.  For the past few years, if I didn't want to sleep or didn't have time to, I just didn't.  I'm finding that this is a harder and harder practice to maintain.  I'm wearing myself out.  Maybe sleeping at regular times won't be so bad.  I can work around it.  Perhaps if I have a schedule, my life won't be so helter skelter all the time.  That might be nice.  Let's give it a go.

Here's to sleeping schedules and trying to regulate my circadian rhythm for the first time in years.  If it works, I just might stick with it.

signs and wonders

This weekend I went to Las Vegas to visit my brother, his wife, and their new baby, Caleb. Little Caleb was given his baby blessing, and his father did a beautiful job. Caleb is gorgeous and so perfect. I couldn't get enough of him.

Due to our (my aunt, uncle, cousin, and I) arriving on Saturday afternoon and leaving on Sunday afternoon, I was not able to visit downtown. Thus, I unfortunately did not see the Bellagio fountains. That will just have to wait for another trip.

It was fabulous, and I wish I could've stayed longer. Alas, I must go to work in the morning. I am definitely hoping that I will be able to go visit later in the summer. Here's to Vegas. There's a wax museum in Vegas.

Caleb and I last night.	Grandpa and the baby.
Yeah, CJ's a daddy now. We're all very happy for him.	Caleb loves his mommy.
Caleb and Grandma . . . getting ready for the big day.	Chillin' after church.
Four generations.	The Family.

The extended family that came for the occasion.