one week down . . . twenty-nine more to go.
Sunday, September 09, 2007
Perhaps counting down is not the best way to do things. Yes, I am anxious to get out of Utah, but the BYU Theatre Department has been good to me and I know I'll miss it a little when I'm gone. Also, graduating with a BA sort of means that I'm a grown up and I have to start real life. Am I ready for that? britta asked once when we become grown-ups . . . and I don't know, but I think graduation will make me feel like one. Maybe I'll just stick to the criteria of having frames on your walls. It'll be easy to avoid grown-upedness that way.
So, meanwhile, my first week of classes are over. I didn't get into the English class I was trying for, but it's not too big a deal. I'm taking Modern Architecture instead, and I'll just take English next semester. It's a class I wish I hadn't put off. People always warn you not to put off science or math classes . . . well, no one warned me about English.
I finished most of the drafting for Figaro. My TD said that I'll probably have to cut stuff . . . which is a shame because I have no idea what I can cut and still make it work. I'll find out how much we're over budget this week . . . and I guess I'll just have to adjust. The show's fine. I'm not particularly devoted to it . . . which is a shame. Everything will turn out nicely, I'm sure. I'll be glad to be done with this show by October 29th. I'll get a short break from designing before I pick up with Berlin next semester. Actually, we will probably begin meetings for that show in December some time.
Speaking of December, I think I might have it worked out so that I can come home like, four days early. I'm waiting to hear back from one of my professors, but most of my finals are papers . . . and the only scheduled one seems to be on the first day of finals. Which means, that I might be able to come home on the 17th instead of the 21st. That would be absolutely wonderful.
posted by tuesday at 8:57 PM
5 Comments:
I waffle between grasping desperately at the remaining parts of me that still make me feel young (my cheekbones, my clothes, my bicycle) and trembling in fear of growing old and losing my youthful hold on those things. I don't have anything on my walls these days, much less framed art, but I can't help feeling helplessly old nonetheless. Utah or not, start embracing the fact that you're still a student. It's one more tie to the community of young people that you're fast departing.
I'm sorry. That was such a pessimistic thing to say. Forget youth. I just can't wait for you to be out of there and living somewhat closer to the Promised Land. You'll be welcomed, I promise, young or not.
We're stuck in a time in life we didn't really think of when we were kids . . . the point where we still feel young but are supposed to call ourselves grown up. I suppose I always thought that I'd just know when "grown up" came and accept it. I always thought that it would just come and be a natural transition.
Maybe you're right. Youth has nothing to do with happiness. Happiness is about what you're doing with your life. And the people you love.
my mom says she still doesn't feel like a grown up. GREAT. so i thought this was a phase, a quarter-life crisis. but it turns out that we never stop feeling this way, and we never grow out of it, and we never start actually feeling like grown-ups. i don't think i can handle that kind of pressure.
I think that one comic I sent you sums it up pretty nicely. We just have to deal.
Grownups
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